When I took a good look around

You spend far too much time planning your wedding, for as quickly as it flies by. I mean, I feel bad when I spend an hour making a dinner that is eaten in about ten minutes, so you can imagine what spending nearly 11 months planning about a 7 hour party can do. It soars by. You lose track of time and when you hear what time it is, how far into it all you are and how little is left, it is a bit heartbreaking. (of course, there did come a point in the night when it was only 10 pm and we were both exhausted but were determined to spend the rest of the evening at the party). Looking back a year later, here is what I remember of the day.

* I hit the snooze button that morning on my phone. Even on my wedding day, I wanted a few more minutes of sleep.

* I was instructed to wash my hair that morning and blow it dry. Here is a photo I snapped of myself before we took off for the hair appointment.



* The girl at the tanning salon next door (where I had a small account with to even out my tan lines) asked if I would want to pop into the bed after I got my hair done for one last tan before the ceremony. I found that strange.

* Mom and I had bagels at NW Bagel Deli and I remember sitting there wondering if anyone else there knew what an important day it was for me.

* My friend and makeup artist was 45 minutes late to getting there to do my makeup. She kind of copped an attitude with me, but my makeup was beautiful and she did my mom for free too.

* While sitting in the chair getting my makeup done, I saw Lindsay Whareham and Josh Schwartz walk into the mall, probably head down to Macy's to get our wedding gift and leave again. I never called their attention, but would later see them at the wedding.

* Standing in my parents kitchen, somewhat pacing as I ate a ham sandwich about a half hour before I had to leave for the church.

* Text messaging Mike, much to his surprise. He didn't think that he would have any contact with me that day.

* Driving myself, alone, to the church. I got impatient and didn't want to wait any longer for her to get there. When I arrived at the church, there was only one other car there - Mike's. He and his brother were the first ones there. Darrick had to help me bring things in while Mike waited downstairs.

* Using the same restroom at the church I had used all of my life. I grew up that church . . . it's strange how the mundane and the extremely rare and extraordinary can mesh together like that.

* Trying my hardest to get into my Spanx and strapless bra without help. I finally had to call one of the girls into help hook things up correctly.

* Doing what I could to still play "photographer" that day. I managed to snap about seven photos before I realized that it was a moot point. But knowing that I would not be able to snap my own photos of the day did nag at me for quite a while leading up to the wedding.

* All of us girls huddled around the mirror trying to curl our hair, again, since something in the air that day made it impossible for any of us to hold what was originally put in.

* Helping Aja with her eye makeup. I always want my friends to look amazing.

* Having a small heart to heart with Jasmine about the fact that she wasn't going to get a basket of petals to sprinkle down the aisle. Instead, she'd have a pretty bouquet to carry.

* Getting to see Mike for the first time . . . it's one of those moments when time kind of feels like it will stand still forever.

* Jenn coming into the Bride's room to say hello. We were both in tears . . .

* Standing there, waiting for my father to walk me down the aisle, my heart racing with a bittersweet mixture of excitement and anticipation and the realization I wasn't going to be his little girl anymore. I was now going to be someone's wife.

* Walking down the aisle, I only saw Mike and my mother. . . I know other people were there, but those two were the only ones I saw.

* During the first prayer, a renegade tear ran down my face, off the tip of my nose and met my lips. I had one hand in Mike's, the other wrapped through my father's arm and holding my bouquet. I didn't know how to wipe that without disrupting anyone. So I let it stay there till it dried.

* Jumping for joy when the minister announced us as Husband and Wife. Finally.

* Getting into the limo to head to the Hilton . . . it was white and as we slid into the back, the radio was playing Billy Idol's "Love Stinks". I had to laugh.

* Noticing the cake was missing the cake topper I'd spent weeks searching for online. I asked Kate to find out where it was and the next time I looked up, it was there, perfectly in place.

* Sitting there, listening to our brother's, friends and father's toasts, knowing I wouldn't remember them but trying my best to hear what was said well enough to recall something. All I really remember is Kate and Aja mentioning how since we'd all met in high school and hadn't met as young children, I was probably their first friend by choice.

* Dancing with Mike. Him dipping me the first time, beautifully and nearly dropping me on the second dip.

* Dancing with my father and though we'd learned and practiced the waltz together, we never factored in my massive bustle. We had to throw the waltz out the window and just dance as we always do together at weddings.

* My brother being the first to come dance with me during the money dance.

* Running into Jenn and Sarah Steidl in the restroom. I just came in for some air.

* Stopping for a bit and just sitting alone with Mike at the head table. Someone snapped this pic of me as we just relaxed for the moment.



* Dancing with Jasmine. I can remember being little and wanting so desperately for the bride at any wedding we went to, to pay attention to me. If Jasmine was feeling anything like that, I wanted to fulfill that dream for her.

* Going with Mike up to our room, still in the heels I'd worn all evening. I never changed into my extra shoes. Those last few steps were a struggle, but I made it.

* Falling asleep next to my husband, the first of thousands of nights to come.